Labels, As I Perceive Them.

BA62A735-4058-4591-B165-158191C19F22

Labels as I perceive them:

Labels can be an odd combination ranging from constricting air tight jars embedded with vague ideas of who you are or who you appear to be, then falling straight into classification of similar people to help alleviate friendships, blooming into concepts about your very being and boosting the process of self discovery, apparently.

Continue reading “Labels, As I Perceive Them.”

Advertisements
Labels, As I Perceive Them.

I Can’t Make Conversation!

50D27EF4-0359-4B36-9043-81D4B79210DC

So I’ve got many talents ranging from an expertise in procrastination and thinking about the inevitability of death 24/7 I’d say I’m good at a reasonable amount of things for someone my age. On the other hand though there are a few, I mean a lot of things I absolutely suck at, those include sports, cooking, going outside and the list goes…pretty far. But we’re going to focus on one, which is making conversation with someone.

Continue reading “I Can’t Make Conversation!”

I Can’t Make Conversation!

I’ll Sleep On The Floor

0BC9606E-9280-46E0-B4B8-F4A4BC24F547

I said I’ll sleep on the floor tonight. With Bon Iver playing from the vinyl on the top of your bookshelf. I turn my head to face the mason jar filled with “reasons to live” I scribbled with my trembling left hand at four in the morning when I thought I’d lost you to the flame colored crimson blood on your arms. And I told you I’d write you a song, a poem hell I’d even write a book for you but you didn’t need my words you needed so much more.

Continue reading “I’ll Sleep On The Floor”

I’ll Sleep On The Floor

Suffering And Smiling

4B385750-D675-48AF-8477-1787DFF2A64E

Suffering and smiling are two things I’ve learned to do side by side. Some days it feels like my intellect is collapsing the power to think for myself as it leans on opinions guarded by somebody else, but is that okay? I, I fail to push away the colorless spots my vision often creates, and my solid solid dreams are starting to loose their solidarity they don’t seem that real to me, anymore. Because I built my today on what will happen tomorrow, every day is like the burning wax under a candle flame, it’s never really here to stay. And I wonder how long till that candle withers away and I have to face the day.

Because someone once said that happiness is overrated but how can that be true when happiness is all that I’ve ever chased,

Continue reading “Suffering And Smiling”

Suffering And Smiling

I Can’t Accept Change

pexels-photo-712877

I’ve never really been good at excepting change, whether it’s with something as small as buying clothes in colors apart from black or weather it’s something as large as moving house. Change doesn’t just scare me like it does most people, change is like that step from warmth straight into the winter snow. And there’s this feeling the unfamiliarity of a situation brings that I find hard to digest.

Continue reading “I Can’t Accept Change”

I Can’t Accept Change

A Quick Thank You.

437H

And I am no longer the girl in the picture frame sat atop your fireplace. The one with long hair, a smile showing teeth and skin soft as silk glowing under the warm summer sun. Glistening eyes under the light as my head rests upon your shoulder.

I don’t smile like that anymore and I almost never go outside. You still call to see if I’m alright. And I often say I’m fine. Then the line goes dead and my head slides back in the position it was a while ago, against the window. Staring at the sun as the rays shoot past trees, the warmth it brings gives rise to memories I had buried deep inside. Memories of you and I. -H

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

Hey guys I just wanted to put in this little note type thingy at the end. So I reached a total of 1000 likes on my blog and that’s huge, at least for me it is. Because I never imagined I could get to where I am today, I’ve always thought of myself as a total flop in general.

I’ve always been clumsy and I’m super tall and awkward and I don’t do well when it comes to social situations. The list of my imperfections goes a long way and I’d hate to bore you so I’m just going to get to the point. I may be bad at almost everything I do but writing is something I truly believe I’m good at. And no I’m not the best and I can’t ever be the best because there will always be someone better than me out there and that’s not necessarily a bad thing, it just means I have more people to look up to and learn from.

I’m truly grateful for every single person that has taken the time to read my writing. You are amazing and you matter and I appreciate you. If any of you guys ever want someone to just talk to leave me a comment and we’ll talk, if you’re ever down or feel alone just come to me and I’d love to hear you out.

Once again thank you for blowing my mind with your amazing support and helping me reach my goals.-H

A Quick Thank You.

Things To Get Off My Chest, pt:1

pexels-photo-512861

You live a hundred different lives. Each personality impaled into your chest, digging in like daggers thrust upon flesh.

I think back to the days you resembled something normal, when we could just sit at the dinner table, all four of us and we could talk about the neighbours dog, when making conversation wasn’t all that hard and sitting by you didn’t feel like the part of a job.

Now I pick the words I say, when I’m in a room with you I feel like I’m suffocating and the tension only rises from there. Zipped up mouths and every action is calculated, it doesn’t feel like a home anymore it’s more like an army camp.

And each day you come up with something new to fight about, something that shouldn’t matter at all. Accusations are made and fingers are pointed between you and her, I just sit aside not wanting to be caught in the storm you give birth to every night.

Flames dance on the ceiling of our house, the atmosphere always rigid. And I see you eating away at her brain and I wish I could say, but you’re too good at that game. How you twist it around and suddenly you’re the victim in this round.

And we’re not a family anymore, though we might have been long ago. We’re just a group people living under the same roof, simply because we have to.-H

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

So I figured that every now and then there are going to be things that bother me, things that hurt me in my personal life. And keeping them buried in my body won’t do any good, but to have them sit in my drafts won’t either. That’s pretty much why I came up with this series type thingy called “Things To Get Off My Chest”. Here I’m just going to write about the things that I don’t want to weigh me down. And maybe this is the last time I do this or maybe this is a start to something great, whatever it is, all that I know is that I felt like doing it and so I did it.

All that I can hope is that you guys can find something to relate to, something take away. Even if it’s something small that really doesn’t matter as long as it’s something at all.-H

Things To Get Off My Chest, pt:1